On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Back to Five

I didn't think I would survive yesterday. Seriously, I thought it would be the end of me and our family. Many, many thanks for all the love and support.

In her discharge survey, Sissy reported that she hasn't learned anything while away at the hospital, that she anticipates returning to her previous behaviors. *sigh*

And of course, the hospital was unprepared with the appropriate paperwork for her discharge. School records? We still don't know if Sissy will be repeating fifth grade or if, after so many years fighting, she'll finally get an IEP so she can go on to sixth grade? The jury is still out.

How is she? How are we?
She is honeymooning but I'm keen. I can hear it in her voice and see it on her face. It's all right there, just under the surface. Earlier today I was predicting her to return to "normal" by tonight. She's still maintaining so I'll bump my guess back 12 hours. Tomorrow morning. Hygiene? Good gosh, I just don't understand how a child of her age can personally tolerate being so grimy, how she can not even notice? Or is it that she doesn't care?

And we are? In shock, numb, bewildered, angry, panicky, afraid, anxious, all of the above.

Tomorrow morning, we meet the new IFI team.

hooray

i'm

so

...

excited...

*blink blink*

10 comments:

Ashley said...

Much love from here. I wish there was more I could do.

Ten Beautiful Years said...

Praying 4 U and the whole family!!!!!!!!

Barb G said...

(((((hugs))))) Thinking of you.

Trauma Mama said...

Hopefully, she will honeymoon long enough for you to catch your breath. Sending love and prayers.

GB's Mom said...

Hang tight! Call anytime. You are never alone.

Lisa said...

hugs sent from the north - didn't the timing on this work out wonderfully? No break from her since it's summer vacation - just jump right back in with both feet.

kisekileia said...

If there's any chance that it'll help you feel any better for a brief time, here is a kitten. The blog containing the kitten is very warm and sweet and smile-inducing.

Lola Granola said...

Wandering blogs, and I just wanted to offer random stranger support. I have friends who, under different circs, have in fact found a private adoption placement for a daughter and it is no picnic, and we've had our own struggles here, tho different from yours. Good luck. I hope you get some kind of miracle.

Emma said...

Thinking of you. I just found your blog recently and really enjoy it. I hope you are finding some moments of peace and calm amongst the stress. Emma

Johanna said...

Just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and praying hard!!