On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

getting it done

Disclaimer: after I wrote the post and thought about this insane day, it occurred to me that it may come across as though this day was annoying and aggravating. But that's just it. I LOVED it. Every minute of this insanity! Plus, I willing offered to help D with L and C, I agreed to tutor when asked and I offered to drive Wonder girl's friend home from Daisy's because I love these people and I like having them in my life. Added bonus, it makes for good blogging material when you roll it all into one zany day.

INSANELY crazy day. I have NO IDEA what possessed me to do what I did today but I did it and gosh was it ever fun! At some point in the day, someone asked me why I had my day listed out by times of the events on the green board in the kitchen. well, let me tell you, if it hadn't been for that list today, I surely would have lost my mind.

7:12 am the alarm goes off (why 7:12? so I can hit the snooze twice and wake up at 7:30) Only I couldn't hit the snooze today. I had to jump in the shower but not before calling my friend D~ "I'm jumping in the shower but the front door's unlocked, just come in!"

7:45 I am throwing on my shirt and muttering, "oh damn!" because my clothes closet is in the hallway by the front door (I surrendered my bedroom closet 18 months ago so The Dad could turn it into his office. Now Mommy gets dressed in the hallway which means Mommy is streaking alot which means if you have guests pulling into your driveway while you're dressing, you have to mutter "Oh Damn!" from time to time as you shove your arms into holes in shirts)

7:45:30 D~ and her girls, L and C are stumbling through the door just as I yank my shirt over my waist, my hair uncombed and drippy wet. D is aggravated with L and C is fake coughing. D hands me a bag of cough drops. "If C decides she needs to fake cough, you hand her a losenge. The.first.time" I nod in acknowledgement. C is 19 and RADs. She can fake any bodily function she wants. No joke. The girl could be a magician (if people liked bodily function type of humor/magic)

wonder girl and Aspie boy stumble out of bed after our long day the day before and are greeted by the raucous L and C create. D waves good bye and mouths a "good luck" to me as she drives away.

I hand C and broom and say, "since you're here, be useful!" and I usher Aspie Boy and Wonder Girl to their rooms to get dressed.

8:15 we are a screaming, jumbled, bumbling mess of arms, legs and running mouths as we pile into the van to take L to work. L is severely impaired but has a day job. With my address in hand, she confidently proclaims that she can direct "the short bus" to my house. I tell her, "no worries, L, the driver knows my neighborhood, he drives my neighbor too and from every day." My neighbor has Down Syndrome, she lives at home with her parents but spends her days at the senior center.

The drive to L's work was the longest 15 minute drive of my life. L screaming at C, C screaming at Aspie Boy, wonder girl smuggly sitting in the back seat. I finally said, "OK L, tell me something about your weekend" because L and C had spent last Thursday with us and then enjoyed the weekend at Myrtle Beach. At that point, C decides to fake cough and I thrust my hand into my purse and tossed one at her in the back seat. "You have such an awesome mom C, she tells me how to take care of you even when she's not here!" I ask L again to share something and thus we began a round-robin discussion of highlights of our weekend and every time it was Aspie Boy's turn there was a chorus of four women shouting at him, "ASPIE BOY! STOP TALKING!" because you can't ask my son to paraphrase. LMAO!

8:40 we drive past L and C's house to get L's clothes since she left them in their rush to get to my house the hour beforehand.

8:45 we make it to the board of education's office to sign consent of release of records so the county can get records from the RTC and just as we get to the door of the building, Aspie Boy stubs his toe on the door jamb and literally dropped to the floor like a sack of potatoes right there, on the threshold of the door, screaming at the top of his lungs and I just stood there with the door hanging open and the entire vestibule of people staring at the four of us - a sight to see, I'm sure. one frazzled mom, one 19 year old RADish, one 9 year old Asperger kid and one 5 year old priss. We literally drag Aspie Boy, screaming, to a chair so I can ask the receptionist where we go to sign releases. She directs me to floor three and to "judy"

we file into the elevator and press 3. Aspie boy doesn't care for elevators and proceeds to throw himself on the floor... again. This after C and I dragged him still screaming into the dang thing. Aspie Boy is screaming as the door of the elevator opens to one smiling Judy who says so kindly, "I'm Judy, follow me." and I wanted to kiss her.

The four of us file into Judy's office which Aspie Boy proceeds to inspect, followed by Wonder Girl that instinctively replaces everything Aspie boy touches and moves (OMG!!!! can I pour a cocktail at 8:50 am?!?) and Judy so kindly asks for my info while making small talk about all the nuances of our clan and Sissy and... Judy stopped. "C?" she asks. "C.F.?" I nod. C is clueless that she's being inquired about even though she was STANDING IN FRONT OF JUDY (gotta love RADs) and Judy smiles. "C? Do you remember the time you came into my office and locked all of my cabinets, the cabinets I didn't have a key for so the janitor had to drill them all out? I haven't forgotten YOU C..." and I wanted to run away and hide! At which point, Wonder Girl hands Judy all of the things Aspie Boy moved and I say, "OK! we're done here, thanks Judy!" which was followed by Aspie Boy running and humming/thumping/stimming in the wrong direction but confident that he would find the elevator and thus the way out of the building which was followed by RADical C shouting, nay screaming after him (did I mention we were in an OFFICE of about 20 employees in cubicles?) "Aspie Boy! The elevator is this way!" and Wonder Girl was already there, buttons pushed, she's in the thing and prepared to leave us all behind (can you blame her?)

9:10 am we were back at home (THANK GOD!) and C decides to cough again. hand her another cough drop. she gets miffed. "I was only clearing my throat" which I chased with "mom said" so she glared and huffed into the house. I think "dear God in heaven, we have to take the dog to the vet at 10:30!"

9:15 am C is complaining about cough drop
9:20 am C is complaining about cough drop
9:25 am C is complaining about her good for nothing mother
9:30 am C is complaining about me loving her good for nothing mother
9:35 am C is worrying about the vet
9:40 am C is worrying about the dog
9:45 am C is fake coughing again (because the dog is sick so she should be too)
9:45:10 am C is being handed another cough drop
9:46 am C is complaining about cough drop
9:50 am C is complaining about her good for nothing mother
9:55 am C is asking about vet
10:00 am C is yelling at me that it's time to go to the vet
10:00:01 am I direct C to the green board so she can tell me what time it says we go to the vet
10:00:02 am C says, "10:30" and then complains about the cough drop
10:05 am C is telling me it's time to go
10:10 am C is telling me it's time to go
10:15 am C is telling me it's time to go
10:20 am C is telling me it's time to go (the vet is literally 2 minutes away)
10:25 am C is getting into the van and says, "*cough* the dog must really be sick" I hand her another cough drop
10:30 am we get to the vet

now... between 9:15 and 10:30 while C did all of her gyrations, Aspie Boy buzzed about me like a humming bird and said 15,000 times "can I watch it? I want to watch it. when can I watch it?" he was asking to watch Star Wars III

10:31 am we bring the dog into the vet. all four of us. into the tiny office. O.M.G. What the *bleep* was I thinking?!?!?!?!?!?!?
10:32 am vet gives dog cortizone injection
10:32:10 am a very frazzled me says, "all of you, get in the van. no. go. get.in.the.van. just.... go. no, i've got the dog. i have to pay. i'm right here. van.now.go.thankyou."
10:32:25 am vet's receptionist is laughing. not giggling. side splitting laughing. at me. and my crew. I hand her credit card, nonplussed. She wishes me luck and continues to laugh.
10:34 am we return home. C and wonder girl turn on TV. and Aspie watches his movie in his room (i broke all of my TV/movie rules today and I don't friggin' care!) i declare, "mom time!"
11:45 am the short bus drops off L and I'm relieved. Someone smiley and kind! lol
12:00 pm (hey, they were starved) Wonder Girl and I rest on Sissy's living room bed while I wait for my tutoring student to show up - hey, I'm an opportunist. there's a bed in my living room, you think I'm not going to take a nap on it?!?
12:45 pm tutoring student shows up

thankfully C and L and Wonder Girl can play pretty well together. lots of games and trampoline jumping and fun was had by all. There were lots of noisy interruptions and L likes to sing (but she doesn't sing well) so my student and I had lots of giggles

3:45 student leaves
3:46 C asks when Mom is coming
3:47 C asks when mom is coming
3:48 C asks when mom is coming and L shouts "4 o'clock!!! Now shut up already!" (here's to big sisters, can I get an, "Amen"?)
4:10 D returns to get the girls
5:10 The Dad and I decide Pancake Palooza at church isn't happening for us today. I promise to make pancakes tomorrow and we eat sandwiches and chips instead
6:15 Wonder Girl and I leave to take her to her first Daisy's meeting (k-1st grade girl scouts stuff)
7:45 i leave daisy's with Wonder Girl and her Friend to take friend home - it was on the way and I gladly offered. She's a super cute kid!
8:00 get home
8:30 Aspie Boy and Wonder Girl are in bed


oh and some where in all of that I rehung all of the living room pictures we took down when we rearranged the living room, I straightened up the kids' bedrooms, I swept, I wiped tables and counters and fielded about five phone calls for Sissy's crap, er, I mean, school stuff and Aspie Boy's psych eval after his near miss with suspension three weeks back because he threatened to kill the president (UGH!) and email from RTC - they need us to do weekend TL (which means we might be getting more time from insurance? don't know) and it was Call Sissy night and and and

the next five days are going to be just as hellish.
go me.


waldenbunch said...

Funny stuff. Sorry it's so true.

Mama Drama Times Two said...

OK Now click your heels together three times and say "There's No Place Like Home".....

PHEW! What a Day!!!!

GB's Mom said...

I am glad there was a bed in the livingroom for you to take advantage of! Down with insurance companies!

Tudu said...

I am so glad I am not you. LOL The best part was that your son was going to get suspended for threatening the Pres. I'm sure that was stressful for you, worrying you might have to stay home with him for a few days but it's funny from here.

I hope your week passes smoothly and you get some much needed rest.

Jennie said...

LOL to all of you. This post was so much fun to write because as I typed it all I thought, every single one of my RAD mommy bloggers lives this insanity every day, just like me! I hope it gave you a good laugh because after all was said and done, I really did have a good day! I haven't laughed so much at myself in a really long time.

and yeppers, Aspie Boy threatened to kill the president three weeks ago while in a small group discussion about bullies during the school day. THANK GOD the school counselor and I are friends from church! THANK GOD the principal is very familiar with my kids (maybe that's not such a good thing lmao) so when the two of them discussed it, they opted not to follow standard protocol (5 day suspension) in favor of letting us handle it with the strong recommendation that we call his doctors and let them know of any med changes needed or new psych eval info. PHEW!