She doesn't know
Any question we ask that requires thought before the answer can be given, as in any question that isn't a yes or no response (we'll come back to that in a second) has one response from Sissy
At this point, she's done it so much that The Dad and I will preempt her whine by shouting it out in unison for her, complete with tone, inflection and harrumphing glare. Which of course, she hates. Especially if all three of us are shouting "I don't know!" in unison. (fyi - it's a lot of fun, I highly recommend it - it's like a bunch of howling hound dogs, sounds about the same too)
Go ahead. Think of a question you'd like to ask Sissy. Any question. Got it? OK, ask the computer screen your question ....
just like that.
Most poignant question we asked Sissy today after she'd exhausted our reserve with her back to school defiance, disrespect, attitude and two-year-old tantrums:
"Sissy, why are you so good for your teachers that they send us emails telling us how wonderful you are but you continue to make such lousy choices when you're at home?"
Ready? All together now ...
Very good! You did that perfectly, just like Sissy! Did you remember to cross your arms, screw up your face and stamp your feet? you did?!? Excellent! You're hired for Sissy stand-ins anytime. We have 24/7 openings available immediately. The pay isn't great (as in, you get food, clothing and shelter) but you'll have your own bedroom in the living room complete with closing curtains!
OK, as promised. The Yes/No questions usually go like this:
"Sissy, did you wash your hands?"
"Last week I used soap."
"No. Sissy, this question needs a yes or no answer. Did you wash your hands?"
"The towel is wet, you can check it for yourself."
"One more time. Answer only yes or no. Sissy. Did you wash your hands two minutes ago after you used the toilet?"
see? that wasn't a yes or no answer. Somehow there's a blip in her brain that can't translate the words yes and no. There's not a diagnosable syndrome for this condition, however, so we just get to deal. Apparently medications don't address this yes/no brain gap either. As I told the therapist today, "it's like there's a gap in her head and in the gap is the Mississippi river. Some days, when the river is low, she can cross the gap in her brain without any trouble. But watch out, the river is prone to flash floods and then guess what? It ain't safe for anybody to cross and Sissy? She just shuts down because building a bridge to get across safely is too.much.damn.effort"
can you tell I'm a little annoyed?
What gave it away?
And this is the voice of a woman that has had 5 hours of respite this week!!!! It's been that kind of week with Sissy. i love her but man, she can burn me up in a skinny minute some days.