On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

speaking his mind

Aspie boy gets into the van at the car rider lane. "Mom? I want another sister."

I think to myself this is new. he's been singing the "i want a brother" song since the day we brought Wonder Girl home from the hospital. I offered, "Um. Why? Two isn't enough?"

"Well... Sissy's gone."

"Oh. You know she's coming back, right?"

"Can't we just have C~ instead?" (C~ is our totally awesome sitter/family friend)

"No. She's 18. I can't adopt a legal adult." (though I'd have loved to if that had ever been an option)

"Oh."

Later at supper, he started in again. "Mom. WHEN is Sissy coming home?"

"When she starts doing her goals."

"Well, is she?"

"Is she what?"

"Doing them?"

"No." I sighed with desperation.

"Why not?"

"I wish I could tell you that."

"Well, she just needs to start doing them because she can't come home unless she does."

i promise, I'm not feeding him these lines. It's not like he's reading my blog and he could care less about eavesedropping. These conversations were all him

"I agree. Why don't you tell Sissy so yourself?"

His eyes perked up. "When?"

"Tonight. In our phonecall."

He thought for a minute. "Really?"

"Yeah. If she won't hear it from me, maybe she'll hear it from you, her brother. I'd love it if you told her to do her goals so she came home. It might actually do her some good."

"OK!!"

Then when it was time to call her, the RTC phones were down again. Figures. (They recently changed over their phone system and they've had some serious issues with the new system.)

But I think I'm going to hold Aspie Boy to it and I think he'll tell her too. He's not one to mix words. If he has a thought in his head, you're going to hear it. And if you've not spent five minutes with an Asperger kid, then you haven't experienced this particular phenomenon and have no idea why the statement "if he has a thought in his head, you're going to hear it" makes me roll with laughter. It is the understatement of a lifetime.

3 comments:

Claudia said...

how about if borderline Ausbergers is combined with ADHD and OCD? Then it's "If he has a thought in your head you're going to hear it.... 527 times in one day!"

Anonymous said...

I do love that about kids with Aspergers. Of course, I don't live with any, I'm sure it is less delightful when it is 24/7.

Rose said...

So many times I've said about my son "If it goes through his head it comes out his mouth." His current dx is NLD and tested high liked for Aspergers.