When I can't make
the words come out
It's just because
I want to shout.
Sometimes the words
Are not enough
Only screams
Will have the stuff.
I want to punch
Kick and yell
This mounting angry
Sure can swell.
I used to be
So very kind
Now I know
I was just blind.
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The Dad and I had the same dream last night which I have to admit, is really freaky but telling of our anguish. We both dreamed that wee were kidnapped by a dark haired man with tan skin. In my dream, he was part of a family group from the mafia. In his dream, he was a hill billy. In both, we knew that to attempt to scream or escape would be death. The tan skinned man held a gun to my head when I tried. When I explained that I had no money, no cash, no credit cards on me, no valuable possessions, NOTHING worth kidnapping me for, he laughed.
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pdoc says we could try hospital homebound education for Sissy. I just laughed. Right. And give her the opportunity to harrass me 24/7? I don't think so. We are all worried about Sissy's unabated weight gain on the resperidal. We are titrating her on geodon over the next 10 days. do I think it will make a difference in her ability to control her rage? Not for a skinny minute.
2 comments:
What is hospital homebound education?
@kisekileia - it means she is getting her education at home with 3-5 hours of instruction/week from a county public school educator. The rest of the work is done independently and submitted weekly back to her homeroom teacher. It is the same education a student would get if they were in a hospital for long term treatment but they didn't want to lose the academic year on the transcript. Essentially, it's homeschooling through the public school.
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