On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Sunday, May 2, 2010

psychometric evals

This week was also Sissy's annual psychology evaluation. The packet of paperwork to plow through is staggering. It takes me about 3 hours, mostly my assessments but some of it is questionnaires Sissy needs to do either with my help or by herself.

Tonight, we finished the last few of them together. It required her answers and evaluations of herself as I read brief statements.

She rated herself as hearing voices and noises and seeing things that others do not hear or see. On several of the tests.

I didn't flinch. I suspected this. I anticipated this to eventually emerge. Just yesterday she and I were at the table and she said, "did you hear that?"

"Hear what dear?"

"That squeaky noise."

"Was it inside or outside of the house?"

"Inside. Right there." And she pointed to where she anticipated the noise to have come from. Then added, "but you didn't hear it. No one ever does. I'm always the only one that hears it."

"are you still speaking of the squeaky noise?"

"no. lots of other things too."

"oh. ok. I'm sorry that happens to you. Will you let me know when it happens again?" She agreed and we ended the conversation.

But, on the evaluations, she scored her self-value rather highly, resoundingly answering that she thinks a lot of herself, does not believe that others have a reason to laugh at or make fun of her (when they do, a lot. One boy has been chasing her on the playground at school calling her "crazy woman" (boy, it's hard not to laugh at that one!) but since she's reporting that kids don't have a reason to make fun of her I guess she doesn't notice?) Anyway, she reports that she most absolutely, positively has no desire to kill herself. She was quite adamant. Which in turn made me very suspicious. But I didn't alter her responses on the test. I just answered it as she told it to me.

I was glad she was willing to do them with me so I could know her responses. It helps me understand how she's thinking right now. I'll be interested to see what the psychology team ultimately assesses in the evaluation.

9 days rage free. I'm terrified! lol

[edit] I was reading through back posts, getting a time line. Sissy's typical manic cycle is 15 days to escalation, three days off. Sissy's cycle started on 4/10/10 with full rage on 4/23/10 and some nonsense triangulation stuff through 4/25/10. 15 days. BUT, her typical three days off has gotten an extension because on day three, we upped the meds. OH. says I to myself. Now we understand. So I should expect to see the same pattern but dulled due to meds. Gotcha.

hey. this is GOOD news. I thought Sissy was unpredictable! Nope. She's followed the same manic cycle for almost 18 months at least. 15 days escalation with full rage around day 13, three days off. See? GOOD news! She's classic bipolar I, rapid cyclic with *drum roll* emerging schizoid affect? Yippee!

1 comment:

GB's Mom said...

Psychosis is scary to us- the kids usually don't realize it's significance, even when they realize nobody hears or sees what they do. 2 out of my 4 Bipolars experience psychosis. This type of Bipolar usually reacts well to Risperdal. Try and enjoy the rage free time. Even if the rages come back, they can be a lot further apart which gives you more time to enjoy the kid. Thanks for the hugs- this church mess is hard.