On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Quilt for four straight months? OK!

It's been busy here. And I've been sick. And avoiding. Avoiding the indeterminable truth that this week med!caid reviews Sissy's case and thus far, she's never made it past a three month stay at a hospital. Oh to hit the four month mark...

Tomorrow I make the trip to the hospital to attend the DBHDD review of Sissy's case, a semi-annual event that just makes my heart go pitter-patter. Not cupid's pitter-patter, the cardiologist's tachycardia pitter-patter. Apparently DBHDD from our region lives in Candyland because they don't seem to be aware of the LACK of resources we have for mental health. I recall arguing with them in April about a local agency that closed last November that the DBHDD representatives insisted was still available for youths and adolescents. Oh, and the gracious comment that I should consult my church for mental health assistance for my children. So much for the constitution declaring we shouldn't mix church and state.

For a week Sissy didn't call on her call night. Sometimes I call first but then I get the notion to see if she'll be proactive and initiate a call. I'm usually right when I assume that she won't. But she made sure to call last night to let me know that she missed the hospital's Halloween event because she had a tantrum in class that day. Must have been some kind of tantrum to warrant the punishment of missing a holiday activity. I'm thinking more along the lines of quiet-room restriction during a rage? But getting those kinds of admissions from Sissy are close to impossible. She is keen to deflect, declaring "I don't want to talk about it," as her way of evading the hard truths about herself.

So we wait. Just as the clocks in my kitchen tick and tock, alerting me to the passing of time, the proverbial clock of med!caid's financial patience with my daughter's mental health progress ticks and tocks. Will she be home by next weekend? Your guess is as good as mine. Will we be prepared to transition her home? Nope.

I promised photos from the quilt retreat and I intend to fulfill that promise, tomorrow. Or the next day. I have made some lovely Thanksgiving coaster sets that will be available for purchase. I've also picked up oodles of pink fabrics to make several more breast cancer awareness bags. I've also got lots of fabric to make more I Spy quilts and because of generous donations from my readers, I have oodles and oodles of fabric to make other quilts. AB's dental appliance is working it's magic but now I have to work my magic to pay that bill. So if Sissy does indeed return next weekend, I can just quilt away my blues. I think I'll just quilt straight through to March and Orlando which, incidentally, is only four short months from now.


kisekileia said...

If she raged badly enough to lose the privilege of holiday celebrations, doesn't that bode well for her being able to stay in the hospital?

Ranger said...

Fingers crossed for you that it hasn't been a hard weekend. Thinking of you {}