On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Monday, March 19, 2012

What about Bob?

Have you ever seen that movie, What about Bob?  A quirky and slightly off-kilter psych patient follows his psychiatrist stalks his doctor on his family vacation and ruins EVERYTHING but wins the heart of everyone except his doctor.  In the end, it's the doctor that gets the psychiatric care while Bob waxes philosophical about his journey through his mental illness to wellness.  The movie is aptly titled as the phrase, "What about Bob?" comes up a lot. 

Although I don't liken myself to the quasi-psychotic Bob,  I do relate to the phrase, "What about Bob?"  In this odyssey through the dark corners of mental illness with my children, I've often wanted to shout over the cacophony of talking therapists and doctors, "Hey what about me?!?!"

I'm happy to report that I can wax philosophical  with Bob now.  I went to my doctor appointment today, nearly a year after my string of panic attacks and the inception of my medication and therapy to manage it and am happy to report that my doctor is pleased with my progress.  With his permission, I'm going to begin coming off one of my medications. 

I've returned to the classroom at my former place of employment. I know, I said initially that I didn't want to return to the classroom but necessity is the mother of invention.  In this case, money has driven me to it.  But since Sissy is so much better and because her health was one of the contributing factors to my resignation two and a half years ago, I feel safe to return. It's also a much different classroom and administration environment so I feel confident that I'll be glad I've made this choice.

As for my therapy, I'm blossoming by leaps and bounds.  I've added a group therapy to the individual work and have actually learned more in group in the last three months than I have in the introspective work I've been doing for the past three years. That said  I don't recommend one over the other.  Both have their place in personal healing.  I'm hoping that within the year my individual therapist will be willing to dismiss me.  *crossing fingers*

Lastly, although I've not formally applied, my career intentions are to get a masters and a PhD in social work with the ultimate goal of being in the classroom educating the future therapists of the world.  I've learned so much and I feel as though I have much to offer in return.  I'm excited to be making this step, getting a PhD has long been on my "bucket list".  I hope to begin online classes by the fall and an internship for the clinical hours with the agency that has worked with my daughter the past two years.

And THAT is what is up with "Bob"

Be good to yourself, that's all you can do.

japanese proverb "my barn having burned to the ground, now I can see the moon."

5 comments:

Ilsa said...

All I can say is "You go girl!"...pretty much sums it up :-) It has been just awesome to read your blog and see you blossoming in the past few months. And to see the amazing improvements in Sissy's mental health has been an answer to prayer!

Bee Burg said...

This is good news! :-) Love reading about moving forwards, having goals and making progress...

Ranger said...

Congratulations on deciding to go for the M.Ed/Ph.D!

GB's Mom said...

:)

Unknown said...

You sound wonderful! So happy to see you thriving and making plans! Lots of hard times, lots of hard work. Jackie