On a good day, parenting will test the integrity of your character. On a bad day, parenting will test your will to live. Parenting children with trauma histories will cause you to test the integrity of everything and everyone you thought you knew, for the rest of your life.
~J. Skrobisz

Saturday, September 24, 2011

colossal fail

The Dad left at 7:30 a.m. to head to the hospital to do a family session and bring Sissy home for an overnight therapeutic leave.  By 1:00 p.m. on the trip home, Sissy was raging, self-harming, screaming, using threatening language, it was a mess.  He called from the cell phone and I could barely hear him over her screaming.  I called the hospital and our CBAY team.  He made it home (god only knows how) and I'd already ushered WG and AB to their rooms with doors locked.  I met him in the front of the house and after forcibly removing her from the vehicle, got her to her room where she screamed for another thirty minutes.  I've kept her within arms reach, she's bathed, I gave her a DIY haircut, we're repacking her bags with some seasonally appropriate clothing and getting back in the van within thirty minutes.  I have to have her back at the lobby no later than 8 pm or I'll have to call the after hours number to admit her back in.  Hey, it's better than police and an ambulance escort back to the hospital, that is, assuming she's deescalated enough to make the 2.25 hour trip back with me.

If stories could end up on fail blog dot com then I'd be entering this post.

10 comments:

GB's Mom said...

It sounds like it failed before it ever started. I am sorry.

Kelly said...

wow.

abrianna said...

I am sorry she was so difficult to get home, but this is *not* a fail. Now the place will get to see her in all her glory and hopefully she can stay there longer.

I know it was awful seeing and hearing her, but this is what we have been hoping for-that the facility will see her rage.

jwg said...

Is it enough of a fail to get her a long term placement? If so,then it's not a fail at all.

Ranger said...

Nightmare stuff. Hopefully that will ensure her a longer stay, not that that makes up for your now having to peel yourself down on the ceiling and get your adrenaline levels back down. How is the virus going, are you feeling a bit better physically? (Or were you before this?) Hugs. If I had a magic wand, I'd fed ex it to you.

Pam S said...

I am new to your blog and all I can say is Thank you. To be able to put it out there like it is- is so refreshing. To open your heart and let the raw emotions out is inspiring. I spent two days glued to the screen reading your life. We have 7 bio kids and last year adopted 3 older children from Foster Care. They have been with us a little over a year. Our agency does not even recognise RAD as legitimate so it was a non discussion with them and we were naive.
Bless you and Thank you.
Pam in Alabama

Mommy Merlot said...

i'm sorry that you had such and awful day yesterday! I hope that your family can find some peace soon. I have enjoyed reading your blog. I'm also a mom that has some very special kids and it helps to know that i'm not alone in this big old parenting world.

Lisa said...

Augh - reminds me of my own son when he has a 4 hr. pass and started raging before we even left the parking lot. Sweet as can be in front of the nurses before we left and then kapow! full blown rage until I took him back a few hours later (early even). I was asked to "grade" the visit - ah....a D? an E? I made sure to call the facility so they could hear him screaming in the background and I casually asked if he'd had his meds that morning - they were shocked of course since he NEVER acted like that there. It gave him an additional 12 days there.

I truly hope this opens another door for you. She is one manipulative cookie isn't she?

QueenB said...

Gee, I don't know, it just sounds like you need more training to be an effective parent.....snicker. Ouch. Prayers towards you during this very hard trial, this dark valley. Just looking at your sewing machine, and your beautiful work calms me down. Hope you can find some solutions, and peace.

kisekileia said...

Well, hopefully this'll get her in there for longer.